Hello, I’m Katy,
I’m 42 and I’m married to Luke and we have one daughter – Isla-May who is seven. On instagram you’ll find me at @life_at_number_five and @life_with_the_thomsons. The first captures our renovation of our forever home in Buckinghamshire. I work three days a week as a Nanny (I work long 10 hour days but I love how I then have Thursday and Friday each week to be at home and be ‘Mummy’. The balance works perfectly for us as a family).I grew up in Plymouth in Devon where all my family still live, I am often asked “if you’re from Plymouth what on earth are you doing living here?” I do miss Plymouth, being by the sea and perhaps the different pace of life and I miss my parents enormously but this is home and the place I made my very own family.
Being in my forties I feel content. My thirties were a whirlwind of meeting my ‘now Husband’, buying our first home and becoming a Mummy. Becoming a Parent made me, in my earlier years I was very hungry for a career and worked my way to the top of the Nanny world working for high profile families, the highlight being the Nanny for the England Cricket Team Children!
Now I’m in my forties, I still love my job but for me being the best Mum I can be is my priority – I want to be everything my daughter needs, after the last 18 months during the pandemic she’s grown up so much and sometimes I can’t keep up! I find myself wishing I could turn back time (it’s not secret I adored the baby/toddler years) and in another time and place I’d have happily filled my house and heart with more ‘Isla-May’s’ I go from wishing back time to being excited for what the future holds.
Life is wonderful through a child’s eyes – it’s also scary and I do sometimes find myself already dreading the teenage years, secondary school etc. It’s only now I realise how tough things were for my own Mum when I was that age going through the usual teenage troubles. Mum’s always make everything better, and I just hope I do just as good a job as my lovely mum did (and my Dad of course).
My other worry as a woman in her forties is I have parents in their mid/late sixties who live a 3.5 hour drive away and I feel incredibly guilty that I’m not there. They are all fit and well now, but they are getting older and I find this really hard. I don’t regret my decision to move away – I was a young and naive 19 year old – off to Corsica to work a summer season for the luxury holiday company Mark Warner, I planned to do one season and come home – four seasons later I had the travel bug! I did come home eventually of course but found myself in London where my career as a Nanny.
My parents are both in good health and lead busy lives enjoying retirement – both remarried and both very happy. I can’t help but feel guilty and worry for what’s to come ? Roles reverse eventually – for some sooner than others. I know one day they’ll need me more than I need them – like when I was the child and they looked after me. You never really stop needing your parents do you,? At the grand age of 42 I still ring my mum in my moments of worry, panic, upset…… you just need to hear that voice on the end of the phone, and instantly it’s ok. I worry that as my parents get older I won’t be nearby. Over the years we’ve chatted about my Mum and her husband moving here and that my sister or I will build granny flats half jokingly, half seriously but the reality is – both my parents have lived in Plymouth their entire lives.
My sister lives in Yorkshire with her partner and they run their business there, she too feels the same as me but as adults ourselves now – we are living our lives and sometimes you can’t help where you end up! I’m sure we’ll navigate it together when the time comes that our parents need us but until then I’ll still be ringing for their reassurance, because you’re never too old to not need your parents and one day I’ll give back all they’ve given to me. Albeit from a distance at times, but when they need me, I’ll be there.
I have to be honest the first lockdown I found to be fine, in fact I’ll go as far as to say I enjoyed it. Home School wasn’t compulsory and the sun shone for weeks on end! I will forever be grateful for those months the world stood still and I got to spend every single day with my daughter. The downside was that we went seven whole months without seeing my parents, which at times broke me.
The most recent lockdown I found brutal. My husband works in construction so he worked through the whole pandemic which meant homeschool fell to me. I found it very stressful, a teacher I am not! But we survived – three whole months of ‘Mummy’s School’ ! There were tears, tantrums you name it – but we did our best! I’m a summer girl so the fact it was cold, wet and miserable didn’t help! It was a far cry from the first lockdown and the time apart from my family was even harder. But once again we were reunited, and I’ve never been so grateful to see their faces!
Being with my family brings me joy. I’ve also always loved gardening (I’m no expert but I’ve learnt as I go) we moved in the summer of 2019 and we have a lovely garden which I’ve loved transforming and it’s where I go for ‘me time’ during the summer evenings, I find it relaxing and it makes me so happy and content! I also love reading! No kindles here, I’m an old fashioned girl at heart – give me a book any day. I love a mooch round a bookshop – the smell of the books and feel of the pages!